An Explanation, A Reminder, A Thank You

This summer at the Walt Disney World Summer Project has stretched me more than anything ever has in my life. I have had to cling to Jesus more this summer than possibly I ever consciously have ever before.

This blog post is entirely too hard to write because I know that it means that this summer is coming to an end. Even though project has been over for me for the past 4 weeks, I have been clinging to the hope that maybe my time since project has ended has all been a dream and I'm going to wake up to the sounds of my roommates making breakfast or the sound of Stephanie looking for something in our closet. The more time that passes, the more I know that it's really over- so I might as well face it.

Supporters, I'm writing this specifically to you as a thank you and as an explanation of what God did this summer. I'm also writing this to all of you as a reminder of how big our God is and just what it is we are a part of here on the earth.

This summer, I went into project so excited that I was going to be able to disciple four wonderful girls and I just thought that discipleship was what this summer was all about for me. I thought I was going to be doing a lot of pouring out and that was it. Of course, God doesn't meet our expectations, He meets His own.

Now, I did have the privilege of seeing all of my four girls grow more than I ever thought was possible. I saw one of my girls struggle to keep a hold of  her faith and then realize that she wasn't looking for God in the right places. She was looking for God in people, who are always going to fail her. She was looking for God's toenail and not for Him in all of His entirety. Since I've left and even in the weeks before I left project, I have seen her looking for God and relying on Him solely more and more. She is shining His love to her coworkers and is truly striving to reach out to her coworkers for the sake of the Gospel.

It would be an understatement if I told you I was completely intimidated by one of my girls that I was given to disciple. She has been a Christian since she was a little girl and knew Scripture back and forth, up and down, like the back of her hand. I got to see her get more and more vulnerable, pour into other girls and humble herself to the position of a servant even though she is so knowledgeable. As Christians, it's really hard to humble ourselves anyways, but to see her do it with the knowledge and experience she has as a Christian is unbelievable. I saw her grow so much in the area of humility and I saw her love her coworkers with everything that she has.

My girls along with the rest of project have grown so much and have faced so much adversity. Some of the students on project are ridiculed and made fun of by leaders and by those who they are working alongside of. It's not easy being a Christian in such a liberal work place. I have faced it for the past two years working for the Disney company. My leaders and coworkers will sometimes purposefully try to cause me to stumble- to break my "Christiany ways." For the most part they are very respectful, but some have been known to put down Christian beliefs. Yet, they love them anyways. Jesus calls us to love those whose who persecute us as well as those who love us. We aren't called to fight back with bitterness, we're called to fight back with love. We're called to fully surrender our hearts and souls for these people. That's the only way they could see Jesus in us.

Students also faced adversity on project as well. Satan was working his best to try and break this project apart. Through conflict, through injuries, through surgeries, and through really tough and emotional circumstances these students have fought for sanity. God has protected us this summer. He has been fighting Satan with us and I know that He has never given us anything that we can't handle, but these students fought so long and so hard to stand on two feet. Even in the heartache, we've chosen to be joyful about those hardships simply because we know that if Satan is working that hard to break us down it means that God has big plans for His Kingdom this summer.

This is Johann. He broke his arm on the third day of project and had to have surgery on it. What a trooper.

Like I said before, I thought this summer was going to be all about discipleship and pouring into girls. I didn't think that God was going to teach me anything and I wasn't as concerned with what God had for me this summer as I was with what God had for the students. He blew me right out of the water. Let's start with who He chose to be my best friends this summer.

Kelly Wood was not the person I spent every waking moment with like I had planned. Why God chooses to keep our friendship completely reliant on Skype is a mystery to me, but I know that He has a purpose for it. I was so excited to come into the summer and share a bed with Kelly and lead with her and be best friends in real life and not just in the cyber world. We didn't lead a single thing together, we barely saw each other unless I was braiding her hair before bed or the occasional sitting next to each other in a meeting. It's okay though. She's still my Kell-Bell and I'm still her Kay. God just knew that I needed to grow more this summer than I could have alongside of Kelly.

Kell-Bell and I on our last night on project.

Let's talk about boys for a second. I came into project after two really great friendships with two of my really good guy friends completely crashed and burned. There was a lot of heartache, a lot of hurt feelings, and a lot of mess. I came into project not wanting to be friends with any of the men there because I was afraid of getting hurt or hurting them because I, apparently, am not capable of having any type of close friendship with a guy. I didn't want anything to do with the three male interns on our staff team, I didn't want to be friends with them, I didn't want to talk to them, and I felt really uncomfortable around them for the most part. I closed myself off when they walked into the room and I refused to say more than a couple of words to them in a conversation. Until I realized that I really needed healing in this area of my life and asked God to challenge me (never ask God to challenge you unless you REALLY want Him to, because He WILL show up). The very next morning I get a call from Blake asking me to go to the Magic Kingdom with himself and Chad for the day. In my head and in my heart I was answering him with a huge "NO WAY," but God made "sure I'd love to" come out of my mouth. Long story short- that day began two life-changing friendships that I will never forget. God brought so much healing through my friendship with these two wonderful men of God. I have had destructive friendships with guys in the past and horrible experiences of being used and abused by the male gender. I don't trust them, but when I do I trust them too much.

Chad, me and Blake. Our last night in Magic Kingdom for the summer.

My friendship with Chad and Blake is something that has taught me boundaries, how to pursue Christ, and how to maintain an encouraging relationship with someone of the opposite sex. We respect each other, we have taught each other, and we have loved each other as we all have pursued Christ together. It was hard and it was something that I had to work at every day. I had to push through and really fight God with this. I didn't want to be friends with them, but I needed them this summer. I needed God to work through them in my life and He did the impossible. I'm healing. I'm not perfect yet, but I'm healing. Just writing this is tough because Blake is in Texas and Chad is in Pennsylvania and I'm here in Florida until I go back to Indiana. God knows when we're going to see each other again. Blake and Chad, if you're reading this- I know I've already told you, but I don't think I could tell you enough how much I appreciate your brotherhood. You guys will never know how much God has used you in my life to bring me closer to Him.

I also needed the strength of these two to bring me through some really tough places throughout the summer. I feel like God has thrown everything at me aside from burning my house down. Every big thing of drama on project or every situation that had to be dealt with by the directors- I was either directly or indirectly involved with. Discipleship was harder than I had ever imagined it to be, I found myself speechless at times when talking with girls and really had to rely on the Holy Spirit to speak through me, I had to revisit my past and conquer it again, I was faced with speaking truth into other girls' lives and was literally asked how I could speak it if I didn't truly believe it myself, I wrecked my car, I got calls at 2 a.m. because of emergency situations, I had disapproval of what I was doing this summer from all sides, and I had reminders of just how broken I am every single day. God is so good. Through all of that He gave me exactly what I needed. Saying this summer has been (and continues to be) rough is the biggest understatement of the century, but I have been so at peace throughout everything and I have nothing and no one to thank but God for that.

This is my intern family. They fought for me daily. I fought for them. We'll never be the same.

I have one more story for you and then the relevance of this summer and the friendships will make sense- kind of. One night the staff watched a movie "Renee." Cru is hoping to use it as an outreach tool. Basically it's a tough movie to watch. It shows a lot of brokenness and there's not a cheesy "everything turns out alright in the end" ending. It had a huge impact on all of the staff members. I even had to leave before it was over because I couldn't handle it. I went back to my condo- crying, journaling and listening to Jesus music. In walks Chad looking for Kelly because they had Bible study to plan, but she wasn't there so we started talking about the movie. Turns out that we both related to separate characters in the movie and were reminded of each of our pasts and how far Jesus has carried us. We needed to forgive ourselves and we needed to experience redemption through Jesus. We were both at a low point and needed some fun. It was 9:40 at night (park closes at 11), Tropical storm Debby was brewing outside, but we decided that Magic Kingdom was probably the best option. Yeah... We called up Blake and Kelly who both affirmed that it was a stupid idea, but we did it anyways knowing we had Bible study to plan for. Best night in Magic Kingdom ever. Running down Main Street through puddles that came up to our knees, riding Splash Mountain in the torrential down pour and then proceeding to run through the tropical storm to ride Space Mountain before it closed. The rain washed us clean that night. In that night we saw our brokenness, we saw the joy that Christ has to offer, we saw how community can build us up, we saw the redemption that is possible, and then we saw the rain. We embraced it and let it wash away our sin. We forgave ourselves that night. We embraced the grace the God has for us.

I have seen the world being changed for the sake of Gospel through all of the adversity and spiritual warfare going on. That is the biggest blessing of all. I have seen people come to know who Christ is and just how much He loves them. I have seen students take leaps of faith in every area of their lives. I have seen the Magic Kingdom changed in light of the Gospel this summer. One of our project mottos is Kingdom to Kingdom to the World. Bringing God's Kingdom to the Magic Kingdom to the World. The world comes to the Magic Kingdom to work. Some of the most prestigious of families from all around the world send their children here to work for the summer or for a semester of their schooling. There have been princes from Africa that have come to Disney that we have had the opportunity to share the Gospel with. We have the opportunity here to share the Gospel with the future leaders of unreached nations and of nations that simply do not have the freedom that Christ offers. We are a part of the great commission here in one city, in one happy place where people are searching for magic and pixie dust. Instead we are hoping that they find us, and in us they see Christ. That's our mission.

These are the people who changed my life. These are the people who serve a big God and let Him change the world this summer.

Supporters, you were a part of something huge this summer. You were a part of bringing God's Kingdom to the Magic Kingdom and to the World. You were a part of growth in the lives of 59 college students on this project and 20 staff members. I can not thank you enough for being a part of this journey with me. Thank you for your prayers and your financial support.

A special thanks to my financial supporters- Vince Bradburn, Blake McDonald, First Baptist Church of Muncie, Erin and Greg Case, Nick Boyum, Rachael and Billy Ryan, Irene and Jorge Silva, Melissa Livermore, Katy Kessler, Chris Silva, Alex Evanczyk and of course, my parents. If I forgot your name, I apologize. I know that there's at least one person that I forgot. Anyways, you were a necessary part of this summer. Thanks for taking a leap of faith with me.